


Wounds

by akoa



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Canon, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, the ackermans are hurt and need each other to heal the pain™
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-25
Updated: 2019-03-25
Packaged: 2019-12-07 20:55:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,925
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18240083
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/akoa/pseuds/akoa
Summary: Levi knows of Mikasa's pain better than she does herself.-set in the same universe as my last fic, in which the Ackermans can feel each other's pain.





	Wounds

**Author's Note:**

> not too happy with this one but i had this fic sitting on my docs since What's Mine is Yours, and i thought welp, might as well post it.  
> please enjoy.

The expedition was a failure. 11 dead, 20 injured.

The infirmary was packed, the supplies were running low, and the medics were having trouble holding their own.

Then there was Mikasa Ackerman. Sure, she had a pretty bad wound slicing right down her thigh and it was rather a pain to walk, but here she was, sitting blankly on a cotton bed, chaos unfolding in front of her.

Perhaps it was when she bore witness to the sight of a soldier to her right, face burned, arm severed, and barely hanging on to dear life that she decided her state was nothing to compare.

For days, she lent her hand in the infirmary, helping medics tend to each cut, wound, and broken bone as best as she knew how. It was exhausting and pressing work, to say the least, and her own situation wasn't making it any better.

She couldn't even get a proper night's rest. She had begun to feel those sharp, unexplained stabs of pain again-- this time more terrible than ever-- stinging her in places other than her wounded leg. Recently, it was her hip that left her aching and sleepless each night.

And tonight, it seems, was another one of those nights.

She was told by one of the medics that walking until she tires could help her insomnia, so instead of tossing and turning on her cot until dawn, she decides to try it.

She doesn't get far though, with her leg hindering her every step. When she enters an area with only a single candle lighting the room, she plops on the nearest hardwood bench without thinking and leans her head on the nearby table.

Maybe if she could just close her eyes...

"Oi. Ackerman."

Mikasa shoots up, regarding the voice coming by a small figure by the stove.

"Captain," she says, saluting weakly. She’s surprised she didn’t notice him when she had entered. If she can’t seem to get a grasp on even her basic surroundings, her fatigue must be  _really_ getting to her.

He rolls his eyes at the title. "Drop the formalities. It's just the two of us."

"Yes, sir. Uh, I mean--"

He waves her off, turning to a pot of tea by the burner. He seems to sense her tiredness and takes a second cup from the lower cabinet (she smiles, _the shorty_ ), placing it next to his. She's thankful he hasn't scolded her for breaking curfew, and she hopes he keeps it that way.

He hands her the steaming cup and sits across from her. _Oolong_ , she notes. _With a bit of chamomile._

He eyes her as she sips.

"It's good."

_And just what she needs._

He hums in response, seemingly satisfied with her reply before taking his own. They continue in a calming silence, slowly emptying the pot.

"So," he starts after a while. "I haven't seen you on the training grounds since the expedition."

She notes his underlying question. "I've been tending to the wounded, sir."

"And not to yourself, I presume?"

She gives him a confused look. "I'm sorry, I don't follow."

He sighs. "So you're saying you've been tending to the wounded, but you can't find the time to treat that leg of yours?"

Mikasa inhales sharply. _How did he-?_

Levi seems to reason back with her, almost as if covering a fact he shouldn't have known. "That limp of yours is no joke, Ackerman. You're hurt."

Until this point, she hadn't realized she had become accustomed to the pain. At its mention, she feels her leg whine for attention.

"It's fine. It's not--"

"Mikasa."

She stops at the use of her given name, sounding foreign coming from his lips. It makes her shiver.

"I'm fine. Really, sir," she insists. Besides, there were other soldiers who needed that place in the infirmary than she did.

He glares at her boredly for a few moments, almost as if looking right through her. He suddenly pushes out of his chair, and before she could ask what the hell he wants from her, he's leaving the room. She lets out a breath. She's said something to offend him again.

She has tried to be better around him, at least more respectful. She'd like to think they had grown a little closer, though there were times that he'd catch her so off guard that she'd never really know what to say around him.

_Guess this was one of those times._

She takes the last sips of her tea before placing the cup in the sink, washing it out. It isn't long until she feels a presence enter the room, its annoyance radiating behind her.

_So he's back to hear her out._

She turns then, not looking at him, and instead bows slightly, deciding she needs to apologize for her behaviour. Whatever she had said, he was apparently vexed about it for some damn, ill-fitted reason. Levi was a very uptight man, but her captain nonetheless. Plus, she was _not_ up for dealing with his bullshit tomorrow morning, so she'll suck up her pride, just this once.

"Sir, I'm sorry if I said anything to offen-"

"Enough with the 'sir', already."

She looks up only to see him with a small towel draped across his shoulder, holding a white box in his hand.

"I'm sorry-"

"And for God's sake, stop apologizing. It's starting to piss me off."

She silences herself then. _What the hell?_

"Sit," he says, and she complies.

He kneels slowly before her, opening the white box and taking out--

"Oh."

A gauze.

"Take off your pants."

She stills at the command, almost in disbelief. He smirks and throws the towel at her.

"If you're so uptight."

She scoffs. _Coming from him, that's gold._

She covers herself and pulls her pants off slowly, the garters grazing her wound just enough to make her hiss. He takes her hand in his, gently guiding it down.

"Slow, Mikasa."

She swallows, enjoying how he sounded when speaking her name a _little_ too much.

Ridding her pants, he finally set his eyes on her left leg and the strip of open flesh cutting through the lower thigh to mid-calf.

"Fuck, it's worse than I thought," his hand shoots to his own thigh as if the sight makes his own leg throb. "How the _fuck_ did you manage?"

"It's easier if I don't think about it," she says, turning her head away from him.

"We might even need to stitch this."

Mikasa groans. "Too much of a hassle."

"It's fine. I'll do it."

She's surprised to see him take out a medical tread and needle from the box, not seeing anything like that in the infirmary. Levi catches on.

"My own personal medical supply. The ones in the infirmary are filthy."

She almost laughs at that but the sharp sting from the needle penetrating her skin makes her wince.

"Have you done this before?"

"Many times," he answers, pulling at the string. "Though mostly to myself, so just tell me when the pain is too much."

This intrigues her.

"Why to yourself?"

His voice lowers. "The underground can be merciless."

She quiets at that, but he sighs heavily, almost like he can feel her curiosity. "It's a kill or be killed world down there. Fighting is the only way to survive.”

He continues, focusing on the thread and needle in her thigh, "I thought maybe it could be different. Maybe there was a better world above, away from that disgusting lifestyle. So when Erwin caught me, I followed and joined the Survey Corps."

He pauses. "But it wasn't any different. It was just humans destroying humans, all over again."

She looks at him now, and their eyes find each other.

She finds that she likes her Captain better when he speaks his mind. Sometimes, if he's in a mood, he would go on about his own wishful thinking after they train. It was through those late night sessions and chats that she’d come to truly respect him. It was refreshing.

But it's always over as soon as he starts. He always catches himself and his wandering thoughts from going further.

This time, he leaves it at that and she lets him.

At times, she has to take a break, as biting into her own hand to ease the pain only does so much. Levi also seems to be suffering from her pain too, though she doesn't understand why, especially since  _she's_ the one that has a goddamn needle threading into her skin.

When he finishes stitching her, he ties and bites the string to sever it from the wound. He takes the gauze and wraps it around her slowly.

"You're lucky this didn't get infected, brat. Otherwise, this would have been a whole different story."

She exhales, breathing heavily from the pain. At this point, she has no energy to call out his use of the nickname. "I know."

"You don't,” he says. “Just stop being stubborn for once and take care of yourself."

His scolding is bittersweet because she knows he cares for her well-being (at the very least), but his harsh tone makes it sound like she's compelled to say--

"Yes, sir.” _Oops._

He raises a brow at her before stepping back and viewing his handiwork. He must be satisfied with the results because he wordlessly starts cleaning and packing his tools back into the box while Mikasa continues to sit there, watching. He reaches over to grab the string when his shirt rides up.

"You're hurt too."

He stops.

"Your side," she says.

He raises his shirt to reveal his wound, the same red medical thread holding his hip closed. She holds her hand out it, and surprisingly, he lets her smooth the gash gently. She flinches when she meets it, her own side stinging slightly.

"Stitched by yours truly."

She is about to jab a response, but her words get caught in her throat. Her gaze focuses on the insane number of slashes in his torso. The wounds are rough and dark and just by looking, you can tell they were deep, cutting into areas near vital organs. Her hands move to graze them, and it is then that she wonders exactly how many times her Captain might have had stitch himself up.

_To go through that pain alone..._

"Like I said, it's killed or be killed."

She gazes up at him. He doesn't meet her. Instead, he pulls his shirt back down and clears his throat, turning to walk away.

There was a sort of melancholy in his voice. It’s the same tone he would use when he was unguarded and too exhausted from training to keep his mouth from running-- when his true thoughts threatened to surface.

Thoughts that said, _that's just how the world is._

She wanted to tell him. She wanted to tell him that maybe, after all this is over, things could be different. Someday, maybe the world could change. Someday, there would be peace.

 _Maybe_ , she hopes.

"Thank you, Levi," she calls quietly, so much so that she thinks he won't hear. His name slips out of her mouth without her noticing, but Mikasa finds that his name sounds better than his title, after all.

He stops. Maybe he has heard her own thoughts as well.

_It doesn't have to be that way._

He's quiet for such a long time that she thinks she may have crossed a line but she before she could overthink, Levi turns slightly, a small smile on his lips.

"Rest well, Mikasa."

**Author's Note:**

> thanks for reading!


End file.
